Casting Crumbs

grace‧ful  – Show Spelled Pronunciation[greys-fuhl]
–adjective
characterized by elegance or beauty of form, manner, movement, or speech; elegant: a graceful dancer; a graceful reply.

THIS I AM NOT!!!

klutz  – Show Spelled Pronunciation[kluhts]
–noun Slang.
1.a clumsy, awkward person.

THIS I PROVED TO BE ONCE AGAIN!!

Allow me to paint a beautiful picture for your mind to grasp. . .

Tom and I, with Jaden and Evely in tow, visited out local El Maguy tonight for a mediocre feast of Mexican fare. When we got there Jaden had fallen asleep which meant he would sleep through dinner and save us the $2.00 for another cheese quesedilla. When he is out – he is OUT! So I carry him in and they seat us at a table for four. They brought the highchair and sat it on the opposite side of the table from where I was seated and Tom put Evely in it. I decided the best thing for me to do was to slide over to the chair sitting next to me so that I can be nearer to Evely. I lift my butt off my chair slightly and plan to slide gracefully over to the next chair (Remember I am holding Jaden’s dead sleepy weight on my shoulder). As my fanny hits the next chair instead of planting itself onto the seat it scoots the chair aside and I being already in mid-sit fall flat to the floor continuing to hold Jaden!! His weight on my shoulder continue to push me back onto the floor and I am horrified to see my feet leaving the floor and beginning to rise over my head!

The place is absolutely packed out and in the whole two seconds that it took my flailing body to land on the floor I had a slew of thoughts go through my head. Ones like “Crap, I’m doing it again! Oh, this one is going to leave a mark! How many people are seeing this? How do I go on and eat a normal dinner after this one? Why does Tom have that stupid look on his face and he isn’t even moving?! Is Jaden going to get hurt? Will I even be able to get up?”

Well, All the answers came very quickly. The whole restaurant looked on and I heard the whispers of “Oh my that lady fell down with that baby!” Tom just started giggling and saying “are you okay?”. He takes Jaden from me – who is now crying from being startled out of a nice sleep by landing on the cold floor of a restaurant – good thing I padded his fall! I see several mexican faces hovering around with anxious looks on their faces. The people next to us are having a nice chuckle over my conversation with Tom about my butt and how much it hurts.

This is one moment in my life that seems to continue over and over. I truly am a klutz. I think falling down runs in my family or something.